the difficult {realities} of adoption

What God said to Joshua, He says to you:

"As I was with Moses, so I will be with you;

I will never leave you nor forsake you."

{Joshua 1:5}

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One thing that I learned {the hard way} this weekend is that not everyone is happy with our adoption announcement.  There are a lot of very hurt people out there in internet-land and somehow they found me and unleashed some pretty mean stuff in the comments here.  I got a little taste of the despondency & bitterness that inevitably accompanies lives who have yet to discover the path to healing through true forgiveness.  Instead of hurling me into emotional oblivion, their nefarious words have convinced me even more of the need for our family to pray for our children and to prepare for our adoption while we wait for them to join our family.

It was an interesting day on Satuday, not being near a computer to change the settings on the blog so that I could moderate the comments.  Throughout the day, I could check my email on my phone and there was just an onslaught of cruel, hateful, judgemental remarks flooding my Inbox from people that I don't know and who don't know me.  It was a little bit creepy and a lot shocking and I am just not used to people being so mean (it felt like the little jr. high kid surrounded by a bunch of mean bullies and I couldn't escape!)

And, simultaneously, either on the comments here, on Facebook, via email, or at church on Saturday night I was literally FLOODED with the love, encouragement, and support from our family and friends who know us, know our hearts, and who believe, as we do, that God has called our family to adopt. 

I just want to say THANK YOU to those of you who reached out to love us, who pray for us, and who pray for our children.  We need you.  So much.  {Let us all also commit to pray for those who visited our little corner of internet-land... that they do indeed find the ultimate healing, grace and forgiveness in Jesus Christ.}

I have learned a lot from this experience. I have certainly realized in a fresh way that the grief, loss, abandonment, and the absolute need for forgiveness which inevitably accompanies the adoption journey is very very real.

Rodney and I will not be perfect parents {ha!!}, but we serve the One True God, who is a healing God. One of his names in the Old Testament of the Bible in the Hebrew Language is 'Yahweh Rapha' - this means 'God who restores or heals'. I know that God is a healing God because it says it in the Bible, and I believe it to be true. I have also known the power of God's healing in my own life and in that of my family.  God is the same yesterday, today, and forever.  He does not lie.  His promises are never broken.  Our prayers for our children are already heard and God has His hand on their lives even now as I type. 

"Understand, therefore,

that the LORD your God is indeed God. 

He is the faithful God who keeps His covenant

for a thousand generations

and lavishes His unfailing love

on those who love Him

and obey His commands." 

{Deuteronomy 7:9} 

One resource that I continue to turn to as we prepare for the arrival of our children is Empowered to Connect.  On their blog, they link to a talk by Michael and Amy Monroe (parents of four) entitled "Talking With Children About The Difficult Realities".  As you listen to this hour-long talk, I encourage you to follow along with the handouts. 

"Our children are on a journey. It is a lifelong journey and one that involves all of them; it is a physical, emotional, relational and spiritual journey. It is a journey to discover who they are and whose they are – and there are no shortcuts. It is a journey they must travel; we cannot travel it for them, and neither can we plan every twist and turn or determine where it will ultimately lead.

But we can choose to travel it with them, often following their lead and compassionately guiding them when needed. Along the way they are certain to lead us through rocky places of confusion, valleys of grief and loss and even into dark places of pain. But if, by God’s grace, we will embrace their journey as our own, we will experience one of life’s greatest blessings – the deep and lasting connection that comes from making each step of their journey an inextricable part of our own, and their destination our shared fate."

~Michael & Amy Monroe